Saturday, May 15, 2010

Bitch Mom, Update 1

Leigh called me today while I was at the mall with the babies and Danae, her girlfriend, and a bunch of their friends.  She was very upset to wake up and find that my hubby had gone to work, all of us were gone, and she wanted to know why I didn't wake her up to bring her along. 

I asked her if she had read the paper her dad had given her earlier.

She said yes. 

I said, "There you have it."

She hung up.

I brought home dinner, we all ate, and while I sat down to type, Danae was cackling to Jeff Dunham.  Leigh started to lie back on the sofa, and I asked her what she was doing. "I'm watching TV with ya'll."

I asked her if she remembered reading the paper Dad gave her. " Man, what is with you?"

"Leigh, your room is still a mess, and you're wearing the clothing you wore Wednesday to mow the grass, and have been wearing everyday since then."

"Whatever Mom." Stomping off to her room. 

Here's the notice she got from us this morning:

Boot Camp GSC Style
Basic rules:
1. You live in the house we pay for, eat our food, use our electric, water and trash pick-up, and wear the clothes we buy. Therefore, you will follow our rules until you no longer reside with us.
2. You will strive to be responsible, respectful and fun to be around.
3. You will put forth effort.

Boot Camp Goal 1: CLEANLINESS
1. You will clean your room Grandma Style.** You must have it inspected AFTER everything has been piled on your bed.
2. You will wash and dry all your clothes. Anything that is pajamas or undergarments will go in your dresser. Everything else will be hung in your closet.
3. Your shoes will not smell.
4. Your room will not smell.
5. Your body will not smell.

1. A job well-done.
2. Your phone and MP3 player.
3. Possible out of the house privileges based on attitude.
    ***Pile everything from your floor and the surfaces of your furniture onto your bed. Sweep/mop/dust/wipe down. Begin putting everything away. 

Hubby said that when he gave it to her, she tried to slam her door. Which she can't do because she has slammed it so often and so hard that the board where the doorknob latches into the wall is long gone.  Teehee. I refuse to pay to fix it.  If she makes it through this boot camp of ours, she'll eventually have to earn some money to pay for the repairs.

So we have finished day one of Boot Camp GSC. Nothing has been done in her room.  But she's slept a lot.

And when she wakes up tomorrow and realizes we've left her at home while the rest of us go to the beach, she will be beyond irate. I'm not even sure there's a word to describe what she'll be when this happens.

But I'll be at the beach, and therefore will not hear her. (And my bedroom will be locked.)


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If you are an adoptive parent or have one in your family somewhere, talk to me. I could use some insanity that does NOT call me mom!!