Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Conundrama--Puzzles and Problems

So I thought I did something that would be totally mom-amazing.  I scraped together enough cash to rent a beach house for a week near where my brother and best friend live.  On the beach.  Pool right by our building.  Two bathrooms. Did I mention that it's on the beach?  And near my brother who I see about once a year??

Yay me, right? 

Not so much.

Danae announced, "Well if it means that I'll miss PRIDE, I'm not going." 

PRIDE, for those of you who don't know, is a day long festival for the GLBT community.  There are booths, and food, and shows, and lots of gay people running amok and generally enjoying themselves.  And for those of you new to my world, Danae was bullied into coming out came out recently

I get that PRIDE is important.  Believe me, I do.  But I'm having a hard time reconciling that with the whole "I don't know these people, why are you making me spend time with them?" Which is what she said when she realized that I was serious about making her come with the family to visit my mom for two weeks. 

What's funny is that PRIDE isn't until the fall...  way past our beach trip.  And she's still arguing because she doesn't want to go. Unless we let her girlfriend come with us, which I told her a while back, before I set the date, that I was considering.

Am I wrong to try to force her into getting to know my family?  Am I wrong to just say "this is how we do it in our family" and expect her to shut up and cope with it?  Or do I just resign myself to being another stop on the tour? 

Condundrums and drama. It's what we're good at. 

Any ideas? Thoughts? Anything to make me feel better about this whole thing called older child adoption??


  1. Hmm. I usually am the kind of mom that says "this is how we do it in our family," but if she goes and then mopes and makes vacation a hell for you . . . then, that wouldn't be very pleasant either. You, my girl, need (and deserve) a real vacation. Is there a compromise? Maybe m-t just family and then her girlfriend can come on the weekend? Just an idea . . .:)

  2. I think you are a super awesome mom for renting the beach house. I want to do that some day too!

  3. Thanks guys... she has gotten over herself and her attitude now that she realizes that she won't miss PRIDE, and that she'll be able to bring her girlfriend.

    I haven't yet, however, told her that they will not be sharing a room. That'll be fun.


If you are an adoptive parent or have one in your family somewhere, talk to me. I could use some insanity that does NOT call me mom!!